Would you believe that I dropped my camera yesterday into the ocean. Well I did and now I need a new Canon camera. It might be a blessing in disguise since my camera was getting some age on it. Now they have so much better equipment that I’m sure I’ll not only be able to take more pictures but also get better quality in the pictures I take.
I walked out of the store last night and it had been raining. As luck would have it, I dropped my darn cell phone in a puddle so now I’m checking out cell phones. I need one that has a camera and I can send pictures and text messages because that’s how most of my family keeps in touch. I’m sure I’ll find one that is perfect for me. I better real soon too!! Mama will be mad if she doesn’t hear from me soon.
My brother sent me these and they are too funny not to make sure you have read or heard them. I hope you at least smile at them.
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on ‘insufficient funds’ when they already know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?
Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE……The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends — if they’re okay, then it’s you.
I just found out that my brother, the one that’s just older than I am, is moving to New York. I can’t believe it. Now he’s shopping around for moving companies New York to see which one has the best rating before he just calls anyone to move all of his stuff. It’s a shame how spread out our family is becoming but people have to move to where they can find work and that’s why he’s moving.
My brother sent me this email and said it sounded like something I might do. He might be right. Enjoy!!!
Never Argue with a Woman
One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, ‘Good morning, Ma’am. What are you doing?’
‘Reading a book,’ she replies, (thinking, ‘Isn’t that obvious?’)
‘You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,’ he informs her.
‘I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing. I’m reading’
‘Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I’ll have to take you in and write you up.’
‘For reading a book,’ she replies,
‘You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,’ he informs her again,
‘I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing. I’m reading’
‘Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I’ll have to take you in and write you up.’
‘If you do that, I’ll have to charge you with sexual assault,’ says the woman.
‘But I haven’t even touched you,’ says the game warden.
‘That’s true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.’
‘Have a nice day ma’am,’ and he left.
MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.. It’s likely she can also think.